RomantiCurious

I wouldn’t call myself a ‘night person’ since I do love my sleep; but I do find that my mind is calmer later in the evening or in the early morning before the sun rises. It’s that space in the day where the world falls silent, or at least less noisy, and you can let your mind and body rest. It’s also a time where you can focus inward and indulge in productive reverie and hopefully, wonderful imaginings, instead of anxious thoughts.

Sentimental moments like these usually happen at home, before you sleep or while lying in bed trying to fall asleep, or when you wake up at dawn before the sun is peeking on the horizon. But this night, we decided to just take the time to immerse ourselves in this rare opportunity, of appreciating the quiet side of the city, and of course, celebrating the beauty of the night sky showcasing the splendor of the full moon.

“The moon will guide you through the night with her brightness, but she will always dwell in the darkness, in order to be seen.” ~ Shannon L. Alder

As we strolled through the tall buildings, winding our way down the sidewalks devoid of other people, and the sight of empty streets; we couldn’t help but gaze back at the bright moon, feeling like it was also gazing back at us, though not threateningly, but curiously.

I have had several opportunities for a full moon sighting in different places in the city. Sometimes, the moon has a warm, yellow hue and it is easy to imagine it as a huge round of cheese floating in the sky. It also brings back memories of strange tales related to the patterns you see on its surface – sometimes it looks like a tree, sometimes like a rabbit or some other creature. I often imagine wolves and foxes howling in some forest somewhere to celebrate the full moon.

This night, the moon had a cool, blue hue, at least from my phone’s camera. I know that it doesn’t have its own source of light and it reflects the light from the sun instead. I know the science makes sense but the visual still doesn’t add up. With how bright the moon is, and the sun not being around at night, it’s hard to imagine it doesn’t glow on its own. It actually looks like it shines with its own light, especially since it has its own phases and follows a different trajectory from the sun.

While walking through the silent streets and tall buildings, I cannot help but become sentimental and my mind starts coming up with existential thoughts, questions with no clear answers, and realizations to ponder further on. Thoughts such as, what is our purpose for living, and how do we find it? What do we do while we are in search for our purpose and where do we start?

The answer has always been to start with your “self”. I read somewhere that if we cannot find our purpose yet, instead of feeling frustrated about it, we should focus on pursuing our “self”. When we focus on improving, we transform into the person who is capable of finding our purpose and serving that purpose.

Each encounter during the journey of self growth is an opportunity to find or attract the circumstances – serendipities – that help you realize your purpose. But we need to decide to take that first step and commit to showing up for our “leveled up self” until that important turning point comes around, and then we cross that bridge, or crossroad, when we get there.

In the meantime, we try to do everything with kindness and compassion, and an open mind with the intention of deeper understanding. Realize that we are all striving to become a better version of ourselves – whether we are aware or not – in whatever role we serve. Through it all, we carry our own burdens and we focus so much on them that we forget how our actions or inaction can affect others.

Oftentimes, we forget that each one of us is striving to move forward in their own life journey. Each one is silently struggling through their unique circumstances. Everyone is striving for a bigger goal. Everyone is a work in progress. But we forget and we chase perfection instead. We end up being unkind and harsh even to our selves.

“We are all like the bright moon, we still have our darker side.” ~ Khalil Gibran

One who is hurt sometimes hurts others in order to protect themselves, and so we judge instead of taking the time to understand because that requires us to open up to our own vulnerable side. We become suspicious instead of kind. We envy instead of rejoicing in another’s good fortune.

Remember that we also need to look inward and search for our own light so we can see the light in others too. Just like the moon, we can reflect the light of others but unlike the moon, we can be our own sun and light the world with our own success. We can light someone’s day just with a smile, sincere praise, or a kind word to ease their worries.

We need to find our own light so we do not become blinded or scorched by the light of others - and we can be better reflectors of their light instead. Ask: What lights me up? What do I enjoy doing when I'm alone? What brings me joy even if I'm not paid to do it? Perhaps a night of moon gazing can help us find our answers.

This was truly a ‘silent night’ and I am always grateful for such opportunities to ‘just be’ and not dwell in my anxieties or drown in my sorrows. The full moon has always been associated with things and even people, going crazy. For me, it is always a chance to indulge in sentimental thoughts and self-reflection. It is also a nice moment to romanticize my life as I walk through the silent city streets, under the vast night sky, basking in the glow of the bright full moon.